I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
