College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize
