i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize