i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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