Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Bring me that man meat
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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