her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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