doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
