I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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