His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
