She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
