What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize
