Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize