No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Randomize
