Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
