yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
