It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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