I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Randomize
