Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
