So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
