He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
