is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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