I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
