how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
