Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
