Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize