Whod you bang
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Randomize