I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
