Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I need to sanitize my soul.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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