i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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