THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize