She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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