I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize
