who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
My brain says no but my pants say off.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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