We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
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