you didnt know i had herpes?
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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