on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
