One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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