could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
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