Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
