Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
