I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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