Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
