Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize