that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
