i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
kristin has been a bad kristin
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize