i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize
