We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
