It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
