I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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