yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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