guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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