Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
